“You must love those you lead before you can be an effective leader.”
Really? In today’s hardscrabble, intensely competitive work environments, many would regard “love those you lead” as a naively idealistic notion, if not utterly wrong-headed.
But if your workplace seems too hardscrabble for loving leadership, consider where that quote’s author operated. General Eric Shinseki knows all about leading teams through demanding circumstances. Seriously wounded by a landmine in Vietnam, he returned for another combat leadership tour after arduous months of recovery and rehabilitation. He won three Bronze Star medals for valor and two Purple Hearts, rose through increasingly responsible military commands, supervised some half-million soldiers as Army Chief of Staff, and challenged us to “love those you lead” in his 2003 retirement speech.
Given that track record, Shinseki is an unimpeachably credentialed messenger on leadership. But what exactly is the message for you and me? What does it mean to “love those you lead” in today’s tough workplaces?
That same 2003 retirement speech suggests three commitments one can make to transform loving leadership from vision to everyday reality, whether one manages a small team or runs a massive multinational:
First: Win your team’s respect and confidence; don’t take their allegiance for granted. As Shinseki put it, “You can certainly command without [a loving commitment to team] but you cannot lead without it.” He’s making an important distinction that lousy leaders forget: Flexing one’s authority is not equivalent to showing leadership. The authority to command others and give orders is one thing; leadership is something different: inspiring others to want to work with you and for you.
Second: Put your team members’ needs ahead of your own. “Effective leadership,” Shinseki said, has to do with, “the willingness to sacrifice or subordinate all other concerns – advancement, personal well-being, safety – for others.” That’s a high standard. Most of us would endure that total self-sacrifice for family members; but for work colleagues?
Fortunately, unlike those in the military, most of us aren’t called to put our life on the line for our teams. But if we understand Shinseki’s challenge in a broader sense, it’s supremely relevant within corporate and organizational life. Today’s workplaces too often become “me first” arenas for self-absorbed climbs up the corporate ladder. Loving leaders, Shinseki reminds us, don’t operate that way: They put their teams ahead of their ego and status needs.
The third takeaway follows immediately from the previous one: Develop the potential of every person entrusted to your management. Putting team first implies a commitment to help team members to grow and flourish. As Shinseki put it, “The Army must do two things well each and every day – train Soldiers and grow them into leaders” (emphasis added). For sure, “training” is one part of a manager’s job, what we more often call skill development or professional development. But the loving leader isn’t content merely with turning subordinates into more competent workers, essential though that is. Managers also commit to helping team members discover and tap their full potential and leadership abilities.
Understood properly, “love those you lead” is neither idealistic nor vague. Indeed, nothing could be more realistic and concrete. What does it look like in today’s workplaces? Start with three commitments: Don’t assume the confidence and cooperation of your team, win it. Don’t focus first on yourself, but on your team. Don’t be content with molding competent professionals; nurture leaders.
If you do that much, you’ll be a great leader. But more importantly: you’ll be a great human being.
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March 09, 2021 at 10:38PM
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Love Those You Manage! A Leader’s Three Commitments - Forbes
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